CARE Team

This last week of my hubby's leave have been hectic. Lots of things to do. The first was the FRG leader asked me to join the CARE Team. CAsualty REsponse  Team. I agreed and attended a class given by ACS. The CARE team is used to care for one of the families in your unit following an unexpected death or injury. The unit will activate a CARE team after the family is notified. The team will show up at the family's home and provide assistance if the family is willing to accept. The team consists of a Call, Homecare, Childcare, Meal, and Subsequent team. The call person screens calls and visitors. The homecare person runs errands and helps around the home. The childcare person helps with the children so the family can take care of business. The meal person coordinates meal support for the family and the team. The subsequent team meet out of town guests and assist with any other tasks. Team members should be interviewed and selected. They should be emotionally stable and willing and have the ability to respond on short notice among other things. The team usually helps for 72 hours but based on ability they can help up to 7 days.

The thing a speaker during the class harped on was the DD93. Record of Emergency Data. Whatever is put on the DD93 by the soldier is what the Army goes by. This form overrides a will. This form is the law of the land. If a soldier passes away there is a 4 hour window to notify the family from the time the casualty assistance center receives the report. This is in person. There is a 2 hour phone notification window if the soldier is wounded or seriously ill.  This means the DD93  HAS to be ACCURATE. If you are going out of town for a few days let your FRG leader know. This is so if something happens and they can't find you they will contact your FRG leader if she knows where you are at. This will save a lot of time and drama. They will go to the address and call the number on the DD93. Any unpaid wages and death gratuity will be left to the people stated on the form. In case you don't know the "Person Authorized to Direct Disposition"  is the person you give burial authority to. In the "continuation/remarks" section the soldier can state where extra property is, bank accounts and storage units are. It boogles my mind how many spouses are oblivious to finances and other things. The stories this man told were outrageous. Please know what's on your soldier's DD93 so there are no surprises.

Will is all made

Hubby and I had some free time. We sent our son to grandma and grandpa's for a few days so we can be together before "D" day. We also took advantage of this time to take care of a few errands. One of the errands was having our wills made. Fun times. This is just how I wanted to spend my free time. We called Legal and made an appointment. They sent us an email with information on making a will and what all the terms meant, forms to fill out, and a memo stating it wasn't recommended to bring childen since it would take 3 hours to complete a will. As I filled out the sheets I started to feel sad as I hoped no one would ever have to see these pappers. Although I like to be prepared this wan't the best thing I had to do. The main reason we were having these made was to appoint a guardian for our son. The other questions on the form asked for a representative; a perosn to execute the will. They asked for a guardian and a trustee and at what age our son would have access to his trust. The 2nd packet was for a medical directive.  Who would have medical authority over me if I was unable to decide for myself and if I wanted to be on life support or not.
The day of our appointment we should up to legal and they signed us in. We waited a few minutes to see the lawyers (we had 2 separate ones). The lawyers typed whatever we had filled out on the forms into the computer. They then took us back to have our wills notarized and witnessed. We were out of Legal in about an hour and half. The most important thing the lawyer said to me was

"The soldiers DD93 WILL override the will. Make sure your DD 93 is accurate"

The DD 93 is the Record of Emergency Data. I will get more into this form in my CARE team post. Having a will is a great thing to have for your children. There will be no doubt or arguing on who the guardian is going to be. Parents lets put our minds at ease and make sure our children are taken care of. 

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FRG

Most FRG's use this site

Last week we had an FRG (Family Readiness Group) Meeting. A "mandatory" FRG meeting at that. All the married soldiers were required to attend. Their spouses also, if they could. Of course only about 5 wives attended. The reason the FRG leader made this mandatory was good, but I get back to that later.

I Know, I know as soldiers  and misinformed wives we LOATHE the word, "FRG." We automatically think of the stereotypical squaking hens. Well, guess what they aren't all that. Don't get me wrong, my husband's last unit was crap. I was not welcomed at all. I also didn't take kindly to being treated like crap because I was young and new to "their" group. They thought I was ignorant and didn't know anything. "My" FRGs when I was in the army were awesome. The first one had our barracks room clean and stocked when we returned from Iraq. I had towels to shower with, laundry soap, food, soda, and they even put our linen and pillows in our room. Walking into my room felt like a hotel. Very nice to come back and not have to worry about the barracks. My second unit made us hot soup after we returned from being in the field for 2 weeks in 20 degree weather. In other words as a single soldier the FRG were adopted moms to me. They were always around to help.

Well at this meeting she had the right idea. She had every married soldier (I would have had every soldier period) fill out and FRG contact sheet. She expressed how important it is to be in contact withe the spouses. She stated she would not call anyone to participate. This info was strictly for Emergency and redeployment purposes. I had always said to do this and was always told no previously.

So the point is the FRG NEEDS to know your spouse/family members information. You can even write, "For Emergency/Redeployment purposes only," if it makes you feel better. The FRG is there to help you. To show you outlets. To help and educate the army family. Do some gossip? Yes, but you have the opportunity to change that by being involved. Just like everything else "You Get Back What You Put In."

Marriage Retreat

This past month was a blur of busy. Organization Day kicked off the crazy. They had it at BLORA. I enjoyed myself. But boy was it HOT! This spot had no shade and the little shade we found, the park ranger kicked us out of. The units did set up camo nets but come on it's still burning up outside. They had a few activities for the kids. They served sno cones before lunch was served. Lunch consisted of burger, hot dogs a few sides and best of all watermelon! Yum Yum. They reserved the air conditioned pavilion but it was mostly occupied by the officers. There wasn't enough seating for everyone and there were so many people in there that it wasn't even that cool. Either way my son and I had a good time but here's a heads up to everyone; If your going to have an Org day in 100 degree weather and make the soldiers stay out there for the full 5 hours let people know that maybe should bring 2 vehicles or something because my son was dying of the heat. It was just too hot for those little ones.
A week later hubby's unit hosted a marriage retreat. I will definitely attend another one of these. I had never been to one or really ever heard about them until I heard another wife mention it.  I decided this would be a good thing for the hubby and I to do to strengthen our marriage, maybe help out a few problem areas. "I" was all ready for seminars and discussions actually "Learning" something. All my husband was thinking about was a weekend without our son in a free hotel room. Well we did get both. We got to the hotel (we stayed in the Holiday Inn) and checked in. We sat around for a while then we were served dinner. The first class started after dinner. The class was called, "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage."

It was a 6 part class that was spread throughout the 3 days. This class was not only hilarious it was insightful. It made me stop and think and re-approach some things. It did change my way of thinking. Of course it went through hubby's ear and right out the other, but I know I did MY part to change and the rest is up to him. Oh, also daycare (free) is provided during these classes. After 2 parts of the series we were released for the evening. A few of us went out for a few drinks and to play some darts. The next morning we had breakfast and watched another 2 parts of the series and were then released for the rest of the day around 11:30am. Daycare was provided for the 2 classes and until 5pm that afternoon. I think that was good to let couples have a little free time. We were completely free since our son was with my parents. Another couple and us went wondering around town and called it an early night. The next morning they offered breakfast and a church service which we skipped and then finished the last 2 classes. We were given the book that corresponded with the dvd. Over all I had a very good time. I enjoyed meeting other people. There were some things I would have liked to change. Since we had to transport ourselves to San Antonio there were people showing up and all kinds of crazy hours. Check in was at 4. Some people didn't show up until after the classes were already over which was about 9pm. There should also be a little bit more mandatory attendance. A couple we know showed up Friday after all the classes, missed the first session on Saturday and didn't even show up on Sunday. These 2 are constantly and I mean always fighting. The 2 that needed it the most didn't even attend a session. I hate to see nice things get abused like that. Ruins it for the rest of us. oh well, I will certainly attend the next retreat I hope it is as insightful and this one was.

"I Love Me" Book

I was asked what an "I Love Me" Book was... Let me educate you young grasshopper so you can spread the word. An "I Love Me" book is a binder of everything about you. It's your army life in a nutshell.

This is my "I Love Me" Book

It is a combination of civilian, military, and post military things. I have one, the hubby has one and I made one for my son. My son is mainly birth certificate, social security card and shot records/growth charts but it will expand once school starts. Ok This is whats in my "I Love Me" Book. I use dividers to make organization easier. I keep each section in chronological order with most recent first.

1st Divider: Civilian

In this divider I have:

• Marriage Certificate
• Birth Certificate
• Social Security Card

 Some people choose to have their familes birth certificates or other important paperwork in this section(i.e EFMP, daycare info, Emergency Contacts)

2nd Divider: Orders

I keep all of my orders (PCS, TDY, Deployment and discharge) under this category. I keep them in chronological order from most recent to oldest. In my husbands book I put a sticky note with the date and location of all his orders. Just something to make things easier.

3rd divider: Certificates/Training

This section you put every certificate of training you have ever recieved. Certificates of Completion, DA 1059, Drivers Training, Licenses, AIT, Basic, whatever class/computer course you have taken put proof in this section. It makes things very easy when updating promotion points worksheet. I like to keep the DA 1059 behind the certificate for easy sorting.

4th divider: Awards

I like to put the DA 638 behind the certificate. It helps keep things together and easier to sort through. I also keep my promotion orders in this section or you can put them in the "Orders" section. My husbands book has a "Promotions" section.

5th divider:???

This divider can be anything you want. In my book I have all my college info, transcripts, VA approval, separation checklists, DD214, GI Bill info, Power of Attorneys my husband has given me, and paperwork turning me from a sponsor into a dependent (:( sniff: sniff)

In my husbands book this is for his enlistment paperwork. His reserve, active, and re enlistments. This would be very helpful to keep, to make sure pay and years in service is kept straight.

So these are our "I Love Me" books. I hope this was helpful. I know there are more elaborate ways to organize things but I think this is a simple and easy way. If you have any questions, comments, suggestions please feel free to comment below. Also leave suggestions for upcoming entries.

Boring...

So these past few weeks have been pretty boring. My husbands truck has been out of order for a while. His fuel tank was leaking. We looked at every pick-n-pull/salvage yard we could find and every tank was punctured. Why do they do that? Don't they think someone might want the fuel tank. Any way, we called dodge just to see how much it would be and they wanted to charge us $885. WTF! my husbands truck is a '99. WOW. I finally convinced him to check San Antonio because I knew they would have one and of course we found one. Thankfully I can have my car back now.

Memorial Day weekend we went to Ikea. I bought a few things but the best thing I could was some flatware for my son. It looks so grown up. He still can't handle standard size flatware and the plastic toddler junk doen't let him pick up any food. This set is perfect. I bought 4 sets.

Fabler 3-piece flatware 601.375.71 $4.99

My P90X workout has been going great. I haven't really gained but 3 pounds but I can see my body changing. I just started phase 2 yesterday. I love this program. I feel great.

Oh yeah so my husband turned in his awards and certificates to get his ERB and promotion point worksheet updated before he went to the field. That was on May 6th. Well here we are and they just updated his awards which is better than nothing I guess but they told him they don't know how to do the rest. ??? S1, S1, S1....  wtf! Why does his S1 suck so bad? I was lucky to always have a good S1 and so was my husband until this unit. 1 person knows what is going on in that shop. Why don't we educate the others. Hell I will go in there and work for free just so you stop screwing over soldiers. My husband's friend didn't make cutoff last month because they didn't update his weapons qual. So because of that he didn't get promoted. He raised hell which is exactly what I would have done. Especially since he asked them several times to do it because that's what he needed to get promoted. I don't know whats happening everyone in this unit is so jacked. They even told the hubby when he got there if your high speed you better get over that because no one here is. lol That' great advise.
Well a few up coming events are "O" day, and a couples retreat. The couples retreat was suppose to be at the Great Wolf Lodge but I figured that got too expensive so we are going to San Antonio. oh yay. Well it's a whole weekend with just me and the hubby so I am not going to complain. They dropped the "D" word too so lets hope S1 can get this man's ERB fixed so he can send his NCI packet in and get him promoted before he leaves. Ugh what a miserable boring time thats going to be.